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{"id":1634,"date":"2007-09-25T08:00:31","date_gmt":"2007-09-25T13:00:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/?p=1634"},"modified":"2007-09-25T14:26:07","modified_gmt":"2007-09-25T19:26:07","slug":"foundation-and-empire","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/2007\/09\/foundation-and-empire\/","title":{"rendered":"Foundation And Empire"},"content":{"rendered":"

I ride the subway every day. I see all manner of weirdness and human degradation every time I take the better way and not much can shock or enrage me anymore. <\/p>\n

Except for one thing.<\/p>\n

Women applying make up in transit.<\/p>\n

For some reason I find it as repulsive as full-on meal eating or sneezing open mouthed. What the hell are they thinking? Unless they have a steady-cam arm, how can they even hope to apply a straight lip line? <\/p>\n

I also get kind of sick to my stomach when I start thinking that their make up flakes are flying off their faces as they slather on the foundation, onto my skin. Much like when I get enraged when smokers carelessly flick their cigarette ash out into the world and it lands on me. <\/p>\n

It’s one time I wish I was able to fart on command. <\/p>\n

Update:<\/strong> I want to be clear, I don’t mind the quick touch up here and there, that’s no bother. But the last person who did this beside me was doing the whole hog. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I ride the subway every day. I see all manner of weirdness and human degradation every time I take the better way and not much can shock or enrage me anymore. Except for one thing. Women applying make up in transit. For some reason I find it as repulsive as full-on meal eating or sneezing […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":430,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p9WjY-qm","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1634"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/430"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1634"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1634\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1634"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1634"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1634"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}