Toronto vs New York: Some Observations

Toronto, Travel

Toronto (TO) is surpassing New York City (NYC) in dirt. While TO is still quite clean (I’d eat a pickle slice off the ground in the TTC over the NYC Subway) the actual “feel” of TO is becoming less than stellar. This morning I saw a lot more random garbage during my walk to the subway than I did in my 4 days in NYC.

NYC is friendlier (or, “getting” friendlier?). In NYC, ask anyone for directions and you’ll get a straight answer. Except for people on 9th Avenue for some reason. In TO, people don’t make eye contact so finding someone to ask a question becomes hard.

Taxis. Without a word of a lie: A 10 min cab ride in NYC is equal to a 10 second cab ride in TO, price-wise. NYC cab drivers know how to drive and will drop you off two blocks from your destination if they think they might get into some kind of jam, costing you money. In TO… Fuck. Where do I begin? $4.50 just to get into a cab? The driver we had last night decided that Parliament Street was “…not good! Not good!” because the street was closed to one lane (aren’t most streets in Downtown Toronto one lane these days?). And then proceeded to rack up a $16 cab fare to $25 (no tip) by going up a street with one lane.

Kelsey Grammer can fill a musical theatre venue. And can do it with the shittiest singing voice I’ve ever paid $75 to listen to. And thoroughly enjoyed. I doubt that if Jesus was a Canadian, and he came back to life, and he starred in “Godspell” at the Royal Alexander on King, and the tickets were free, the show would shut in two weeks. One thing I should mention: while Kelsey was the big name, the real star of La Cage Aux Folles was Douglas Hodge, whose edification of Albin won hands limply down over Nathan Lane’s in “The Bird Cage”

TO’s Dundas Square over NYC Times Square? I’ll take TO’s. It’s less crowded and less kinetic. While Times Square is breathtakingly bright and energetic, it gets tiring after 10 minutes trying to rest your eyes on something that doesn’t want your money. At least in TO you can look at Kevin Frankish.

Food? Hands down NYC. Travel to Food? NYC. TO is still young and is still compartmentalizing it’s ethnic diversity so if you want good Italian one night, it’s a streetcar ride over to College and Bathurst, another streetcar in the opposite direction for an hour to get great Indian. NYC is blurring these kind of lines as space becomes more and more expensive. In one block you can get Mexican Fusion, hi-fashion fried chicken on a waffle (I did!) or the latest in hip trendy sushi styles. You can get fried endangered Galapagos turtle on the streets of NYC. TO can’t even manage a good (edible, safe) hot dog.

Apple Store. TO’s Eaton Centre is far less frustrating than 5th Ave’s outlet. While ours smells like wet sock on a good day, at the NYC store, you could get knifed over a Mac Book Air and a Specialist would not even notice you until you bled out and fell hard onto the floor. Maybe.

Museums, Art and General Culture. NYC wins this by default – duh. How do you compete with the culture capital of North America? Besides, TO will soon be abandoning any semblance of intelligent art/culture endowments, replaced with corporate funded pap, thanks to Rob Ford’s proposed money cuts.

I know it’s not fair to compare TO to NYC. TO is an embryo compared to NYC’s maturity. But we’d be wise to look up to our older sibs if we want to be world class.

Couple more pics for you. Be sure to follow my photo updates on my NYC Set on Flickr

Its In The Fog!

Toronto, Travel, You Magnificent Bastard, You Stupid Dick

I’m standing outside SharkBoy’s office, looking at the CN Tower through the skyscrapers thinking how hazy the day is, despite the sun being out in full force. The tower looked like it was an overexposed photo. I shake my head and think I’ve been reading too many How To Photography books.

SharkBoy exits his office and his smiling face lights up my heart. Long weekend! New York Here We Come!

Later, we’re settled in our seats on Flight 113 to Newark. The props haven’t started up despite the plane being 15 minutes late. SharkBoy mentions that fog is rolling in. We wait.

An announcement comes over the PA. Since the plane will be flying in fog, they need to lighten the aircraft by 6 passengers. Those who leave the plane will get the next available flight and a $100 credit. No one leaves and everyone starts to look at each other to see who will blink. Someone yells out “Only $100?!”. After a time the shift supervisor boards the plane with the manifest. She’s… headed straight for us!!

Since we paid the cheapest fare, we’re first off the plane. How this is fair, I have no clue – we’re penalized because we purchased early? And wanted to save some bucks? But I bite my tongue. The aircraft itself is no place to start into something like this, even though SharkBoy tosses out a few cautionary comments about how is this unacceptable. We debark the plane. I’m angry but more embarrassed to be the first people walked off. The hot stares that laser the words “You poor suckers”, burnt into the back of my head as I curtly brush past the apologetic flight attendant.

I’m still not clear why a plane has to lighten it’s load in heavy fog. I may never know. I don’t care right about now.

Since we were first off that meant we were first to see the supervisor who had no clue we were coming back from the plane. No one informed the clerical staff that the ground crew were booting people off the plane and we were met with confusion. SharkBoy is ready to pop. I take a less combative stance and try to figure out what to do next with the shift supervisor. She’s not frazzled but at the same time, she’s got a lot on her plate as more people come off our plane and others are being delayed and eventually cancelled. I have to say while I’m mad (at the weather – how useless is that?) I did have a nice bonding moment with Allison (Ashtor?). We confessed to each other that we hated flying but loved travel.

In the course of the next couple hours I went back to her to stay informed as to out status. Allison (Ashley?) was dealing with one woman who demanded, quite literally, that Porter change the weather. Seriously, she was complaining that Porter had no back up plan for bad weather. Uh… Wot? She was the kind of woman who would jump the queue “just to ask one question” that turned into 5 and ended with her rolling her eyes and not listening to what the staff were telling her (Which she did repeatedly, cell phone hanging off her Holt Renfrew spa toned face). The kind of person you wanted to accidentally walk into a turbo prop engine, Holt Refrew spa toned face first.

At about 7pm they shut down the airport completely due to the fog. We made arrangements for tomorrow morning. My last contact with Asllsionshey I started our conversation by telling her that she was doing an amazing job. And she was. I made mention that working at an airport on an island in a large lake must be frustrating more so than a land locked one. She confessed that if she drove into work and couldn’t see the CN Tower, she knew her day would be trouble.

I’ll take that to heart.