Category Archives: Toronto

This wacky city I live in.

Aaand We’re Back

Distractions, Toronto

I woke at 6am on Saturday morning with a need to do… my duty. After, I sat in bed iPhoning the news and such when suddenly the fan at the foot of the bed revved up to Impossible Speed then turned itself off. Suddenly the VCR and clock blinked. Then the fan turned itself back on and seconds later, just died.

Along with everything else within earshot.

Blackout.

Moeesha the Plant finally blooms!

Moeesha the Plant finally blooms!

It’s amazing how interesting and boring your apartment becomes when you have no power. Like noticing a plant that finally blooms again after 3 years of no flowers. Also going through the process of remembering over and over again that some things need power: like having your iPhone die, and thinking “I’ll just plug it in…” to remember the computer is off, then thinking “Oh well I’ll just use the wall adapter!” and then slapping your forehead in even more stupid realization.

Thankfully I had my new Chinese Cheap Watch to keep time:

The ultra bright LEDs do something to the video… but it’s just a mass of lights you have to really count and think about when you tell time. A geek’s watch.

To fend off ennui, we decided to go for a walk to the Market and investigate the cause of the blackout.

Later we learned that one two four all the transformers at the foot of Parliament Street and Queen exploded in a PCB-showering ball of death. At Sherbourne and Carlton, the force of the overload knocked down powerlines all across the road.

"Can you read?!"

"Can you read?!"

We stood around looking at the yellow tape and the Hydro workers earning time and a half when we were suddenly witness to the extent of Police Patience at 8am. A guy wearing an iPod rode his bike under the yellow tape towards the downed wires which prompted the police and firemen to yell at him with ahem… strong language. I don’t blame the cops, but the berating he got after he was stopped (“Can you read?” he shouts for all the crowd to hear as he takes him back to his cruiser, waving the yellow tape in his face) was a bit harsh.

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We took refuge at the AMC theatre and watched the early showing of The Boys. If you’re a Disney (super)fan then you need to see this documentary of Richard and Bob Sherman, Disney’s favorite songwriters (think Mary Poppins, most of all the songs from the 50s, and more). It was much more interesting than I expected and I admit I did sniffle a couple of times at the heavy sentimentality of their long careers…

Later, we ventured out into the street to see our neighbourhood in the dark. We came across a small South Asian festival parade of sorts, the only beacon of light in our dark neighbourhood. I really liked the music – it nearly converted me:

As we stood at the corner of Parliament and Carlton, one of Cabbagetown’s more colourful character came up to us and engaged us with some jokes:

“What is red and has 7 dents in it? Snow White’s cherry! It’s funny because she was fucked by the seven dwarves!”

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This morning, nearly 24 hours after it went off, the entire apartment clicked on at 6am with a cacophony of alarms, beeps and whirrrs. We’re back!

Dear Toronto News Outlets

Toronto, You Stupid Dick

Yes a storm did rip through GTA and a tornado watch was issued for downtown Toronto, but that doesn’t mean you can drag this out over your entire newscast. Some light poles came down and some shingles flew away. Boo hoo. Oh look here’s a crappy hand held phone video of someone swearing *bleeeep* over a lightning strike! News, people!

Oh and a light post fell over. Not sure how. Probably from the force of hype.

Ann Rohmer over on CP24 is about to explode with all the superlatives she’s been vomiting out of her head. Frank Ferragine has got his serious face on and is concerned for the rest of the day. CTV morning crew are sitting on their couch with subdued hushed tones. The Ceeb is talking to someone in London. England.

Who Watches the Watchmannequins

Tech, Toronto

Down on Queen East, just by Bolton Ave there’s a fun and flip women’s fashion boutique that display the best mannequins EVAR! My geek heart melted!

Sorry, I’m terrible with names and forgot to get the name of the store. Think fun, young, flip and faboo. Anyhoo… here’s video for you!

Lenzr Update

Gaming, Hobbies, Lenzr, Toronto

Just a mild reminder that Lenzr is still going on! You have one month of uploading, voting and winning!

This is my favorite so far in The Summer of Toronto contest!

Here’s my all time grooviest fave in (echo machine) Emergency In Toronto onto onto to!

Skyline In Toronto is a toss up for me. Like this early contender because it looks like it was taken with a 110 Kodak camera. But this one is pretty stunning, if not a bit “postcardy”

Get in there! Vote!

Gotta Screen Those Lyrics, CP24

Toronto, You Stupid Dick

Dear internet searching person Googling “swearing music on cp24 morning”:

I heard it too.

I missed the song title and artist but before CP24 went off to commercial, right after their “Contest Queen” segment, some bright intern played a song with the lyric:

“There ain’t no shit, at all!”

If this takes off, I bet we’re subjected to Phil Collins musical bumpers from now on.

Love,

DeadRobot

Lenzr – A Win/Win Contest

Distractions, Lenzr, Toronto

lenzrlogosmallThis might excite RodTO a bit…

Lenzr is a new photo site that I am proud to say I’m going to help market for the next while. “What is it, other than a rift on the Flickr name,” you inquire? Glad you asked. From their promotional email:

Lenzr is a local photo contest that awards real prizes to people who upload the most popular photos as graded by the membership. Photographers gain exposure + links and the chance at winning cool prizes. Public gets free entertainment (and coupons in future cycles) and access to archives
full of local photos.

Three summer contests launched earlier in July will end midnight August 31st 2009.

So imagine it’s a “Hot or Not” contest where companies offer prizes for the best photos, ensuring their marketing presence online, while we the public get to look at a ton of cool pics while we’re bored at work. Registration is not necessary to vote, but it’s a great way to know when things are changing on the site.

Currently there are three contests going on:

best_summerSummer in Toronto:
What does Summer in the big city mean to you? With the strike I am sure it means big piles of steaming garbage but let’s go past that… Regardless what is posted, the winner gets their choice of smartphone like the iPhone, Blackberry or Pre (and more).


best_emsEmergency in Toronto:
Don’t waste your pics on useless CTV or CityTV web uploads that offer little in return (ooo my name was mentioned on CP24! BAH!). Post your EMS worker bolting into action and you can win a Esquire Verve men’s watch. Got a great arrest shot from that drunk party that was busted up? Was your car rolled on the 401 and you have a nice picture of the Jaws of Life cutting you out? Post it! Time is money!


best_skylineBest Toronto Skyline:
This is the first official Lenzr contest. Simply put, take an amazing shot of our fair city’s profile, post it, tell your friends to vote and bingo bongo, a brand new Pentax Optio P70 compact camera (that shoots 720HD video too!) is in your hot grubby hands.


Want to get a hint on what might be coming up? Want to comment or contact Lenzr? Visit Lenzr’s blog for insider info and schweet schwag! Wanna talk about it? Toronto Forums has made their own section for Lenzr. Chat it out people!

In each contest there are minor stipulations and provisions which you need to read, but you’re not signing over your first born. I wish to damn hot goo I could enter some of these contests. But I will be voting so leave nice comments, people.

Get out there and get clicking!

Unconditional Fail

The Bad, Toronto

Green pass cardBetween Bathurst and Spadina Streets, on the north side of College Street, there are 21 restaurant/cafes of various states of trendiness. I counted this morning while walking to Aunties and Uncles for breakfast (nice food, wasn’t all that impressed with the service) and while I counted I made note of how many of those 21 have Health Code inspection violations: little cards in their window with check marks beside PASS, CONDITIONAL PASS, or CLOSED.

Out of the 21 foodies, 10 had “Conditional” passes, 9 had full passes, one had no check mark and one restaurant didn’t have their sign displayed in the window (which is against the law).

The City of Toronto website posts the infractions on their site but they’re not linkable. Searching on “College”, “Conditional Pass” and a full year from July 08 to July 09 comes up with 47 infractions either active or in the past year, with 23 of them between Spadina and Bathurst. These postings are as current as can be in a city strike – the user has to click an acceptance that the information might not be accurate before searching. But within this search criteria, half the length of College street violations are within the Annex area.

50% seemed like a high number to me. I imagine the inspector was having a bad day with the spouse, screeching into their cell phone as they go from door to door and harshly marking down each incredibly minor infraction just because they were in a bad mood:

“(Shouting down a cell phone) Honey, stop calling me at work! No I will not call the school… (to a waitress) Did you wash your hands? (to the phone) No! I know you wash your hands because we pay so much for fucking Williams-Fucking-Sonoma soap… (to waitress) Not you. (to phone) You! Yes you! What is he doing now? Locked in his room? (to waitress) Way to wipe that counter with that rag! (to phone) I said ‘rag’. Not to you! But I think you are! (to waitress – ripping off a fine notice) Clean up your fucking act (to phone-exiting) You too!”

Probably not, but still, 50% over a solid “city block” area certainly makes you wonder.

Pride Annoys the Neighbours

Queer stuff, Toronto

When I lived on Gloucester and Church a few years, I didn’t mind Pride at all dumping portapotties on my front lawn. I didn’t even mind the constant thumping of disco from beer tents. Nor did I mind the crowds just outside my door or the late night revelry.

The biggest problem I had was lesbian poetry at 8am the Saturday of the dyke march. One Pride they had a “morning ritual” where some flowerchildren decided to greet the dawn of a lesbian new day with a bull horn and uterus filled lyrical (?!) poetry. At 8am. When the night before I got home at 5am after a bar shift.

Behind the South Stage at Mutual and Wood Street sits a poor lowly Co-op that we walked by every day of the celebrations this year. For the most part, people were hanging out on their front door step and partying right along in their own manner (one unit had their music so loud, it nearly drowned out the stage act in the parking lot).

Today, all around the co-op someone is playing scrouge:

Judging by the usage of Comic Sans, redundant hand written “Sign our petition!” and the use of “ipetition” it’s a straight person.*

*I’m kidding. For all I know it could be a tranny who needs her beauty rest.