Category Archives: Personal Bits

Just things from my personal life

Too Much Reality TV

Celebs and Media, Distractions, Personal Bits, Travel

amazing-race-15-12I woke this morning and decided that I shouldn’t let TV rule my creativity.

With Mad Men in-between seasons I can now ease off on the self conscious art director dreams I usually have after watching a single episode. The dream is always the same: I walk into my boss’ office and lay down 5 years of pent up anger at how our company’s brand is more fractured than a plate glass window in a Bruce Willis action film. I usually wake from them weirdly optimistic that work will get better if I just take more initiative.

Now that Amazing Race is nearly over and that Matt Tomljenovich (at right leaning on his father) are out of the race I can stop dreaming about him. Not in a creepy school girl way, he just is in my dreams.

Last night I dreamed I was on a really rusted out ship headed for Tokyo with cameras following 60-70 of us passengers all over the rust bucket as we search for …things… that would better our placement in the game when we arrived. Contestants were practically falling over camera equipment…

…and caged animals… (???)

…as we went from one part of the ship to the next. I had to share a 3 bedded room with 20 guys, which strangely looked like the room I shared with Canadian ex-pats in London’s Earls Court Road. Meanwhile, a camera was thrust into my face as I offered up my bed to a 8 year old kid who thanked me but I could see in his parent’s eyes that I had made some critical strategic reality TV game show error and they were going to crush my spirit at the next challenge or something. Meanwhile Matt was taking off his pants so I was utterly distracted.

We’re Going On a Cruise

Personal Bits, Travel

I know how much you Torontonians hate “Harold the Jewelry Buyer” commercials but I couldn’t resist. We are actually going on a cruise. SharkBoy let it out of the bag yesterday in his post.

Y’see, old SharkBoy and I have had a KD Summer. By that I mean with his strike pay and my “Workshare 4 days a week paycheque” we’ve really been stressed about money all summer. Now that it’s all over we started to look into a nice winter vacation to pump money back into somebody’s economy.

Since it’s announcement of delivery from it’s Nordic shipyards, SharkBoy has been wispfully dreaming of the massive, oil tanker of a cruise ship: Royal Caribbean’s The Oasis of the Seas. I have too – the thought of drinking in an overgrown elevator bar gets me kind of alcoholic:

While I think the ship is amazing, I had reservations that the first couple months of this ship’s life would be like owning a first generation Apple product. And we all know that any first gen Apple product doesn’t resolve certain issues until it’s third reincarnation (see: iMac growing from bulbous Bondi blue to the swinging iBoob to the current simplistic flat design; or follow iPhones up to the 3GS; iPods arrived with a click wheel, to touch pad then back to a physical wheel; and finally Steve Jobs himself with his fancy new liver). I’m concerned that if we were to go on The Oasis inside it’s first 6 months of operation we’d end up with a malfunctioning something/anything. I’m not being a doomsayer Titanic freak here, I’m just saying “lets let the other people iron out the kinks first”. We do plan to sail on her in the next couple years, promise.

So what to do? Quick! To the Internet! I found us an interesting 12 day Caribbean cruise at the same price as a 7-day inside room on The Oasis. But this had two deal breakers, ladies, that sealed the deal:

One – it’s on the Explorer of the Seas, my first cruise ship. The same ship we discovered that SharkBoy and I are totally “travel compatible” and can vacation together in love and harmony with a minimum of over-togetherness snark. But know that SharkBoy does take up a lot of space in a cramped ship cabin. He’s a clothes horse.

And Two: the ship leaves from NYC. Well actually New Jersey, but it’s just a hop across the river via the PATH and we’re on the Island of Manhattan. We’re going to wander NYC like saucer-eyed tourists the day before and the last day of our trip. We’re equally excited about this portion of our vacation as much as the whole cruise itself.

Add to the fact that I found a great hotel in Jersey City AND a Porter flight deal, this vacation seems to be playing itself out in front of us. Kismet!

Expect updates and blubbering for the next 90 days.

Speaking of Anniversary

Personal Bits

Anniversary – From the Latin anniversarius, from the words for year and to turn, meaning (re)turning yearly; known in English since c. 1230

What a weird year we had, eh, husband?

We give each other good email.

We travel really well together

You keep me clean.

You let me act like a goof

I love what you love.

I love where you’re from

I love your energy. You surprise me daily.

Basically I love you very much! Here’s to many more years!

Eat it!

Dead Computer

Distractions, Personal Bits, Tech

See what I did there with the title? Title of blog, title of post? Yeah, I’m all bacony wrapped enigmas.

The last few weeks my poor Pentium 4, 2.3Mhz computer started to act funny. Drivers suddenly didn’t drive things plugged into the USB ports. Things started to fail and somehow my monitor went a pale blue.

And suddenly without notice, my CD burner just refused to be a team player. I can read from a CD but the burning software (hopelessly outdated) will not respond, even after re-installing. It’s a great cup holder, though.

This week, if my computer sleeps or iTunes opens (with every recharging of my iPhone) then my mouse needs to be unpluged and replugged in with not one, but two activate/deactivate sounds.

On Tuesday, I clicked on a YouTube link and suddenly got an alert window (not a browser pop up) letting me know that “they” were sad that I was leaving their page and I should visit more often. Thing is, YouTube doesn’t allow scripts like that within their pages. A chill wend down my spine.

I instantly ran some virus software. Nothing more than usual adware malware came up. Then while the computer was suppose to be idle, I noticed that there was a “hidden window” that couldn’t be closed when I “Alt+Tab” and huge packets of information were being shot off into cyberspace.

I disconnected my RJ-45 instantly. Yikes.

So I’m hopping along on SharkBoy’s iMac in my own recently created profile and I’m lustfully looking at iMacs for myself.

Anyone wanting to donate money to my sorry cause can do so via PayPal or just send bacon.

Halloween Fruition

Distractions, Hobbies, Personal Bits, Toronto
Raaar!

Raaar!

After all the work I put into that costume I have to say last night was worth the effort. I was mauled for pictures and had a great time posing with all the Japanese tourists (I’m generalizing – there were some Eastern Europeans too) . Well, except for the one drunk guy who grabbed my snout and hauled my face down. Thank god for SharkBoy who stopped me from ripping his head off. Let’s just say he’s going to be spitting fake fur out of his mouth and eyes for a few days. Other than that, the night was fun. The stilts held up and worked like a dream, except I should have rested more often. 3 hours seems to be the max and I was on them for just over 4. Yeah … blisters and aches this morning.

I’m really glad to see that costuming on Church Street is becoming more “serious” and thoughtful, like the Queen and the Palace Guard (with England’s national anthem coming out of his big furry hat), or the giant H1N1 virus, or the Chandelier Guy. I’m almost thinking I want to take next year off to just take pictures…

Heh… mmmmaybe not. The attention was addictive.

Here’s where I point out that SharkBoy’s costume was simplistic perfection: he got a lot of recognition but not as much photography mauling as I did. I think he did a fantastic job on his Where the Wild Things Are kid, Max. Here is is full picture set, but I’ve copied some for my blog below (clicko to embiggo). Enjoy!

Full Suit

Full Suit

I Have My Father's Eyes

I Have My Father's Eyes

Tyra Called. I Win!

Tyra Called. I Win!

"Hi! Are you paying too much in Car Insurance?!"
I love this guy! The one on the right.

I love this guy! The one on the right.

Last Minute Attempts At Awesome

Distractions, Personal Bits, Toronto

Fry: It’s just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for the winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns. And also he got a racecar. Is any of this getting through to you?

Yo!I can’t believe how many of you are hitting this blog via frantic searches for “Werewolf costume” and expect to pull something out of your asses within the next 24 hours. Shame on you! I started mine back in June. You can’t rush perfection!

Of course I’m kidding. I value the people who try. Seriously.

The last few times we’ve done Halloween on Church Street we’ve always managed to amuse ourselves at the people dressed in the What The Fuck Costumes. That is, the drunk Ryerson student who throws on a boa or dollar store rubber mask and think they’re “ready to go”. Or witness the people who go to a costume shop and grumble at the variety of sexy nurse costumes the day before Halloween, and wind up being a ghost in a sheet.

Regardless, I’m looking forward to ‘Ween this year. Even if I do fall and break my leg and get H1N1.

Formative Pop – Halloween Story #3

Personal Bits

I don’t recall how old I was.

I don’t recall what I was wearing.

I do recall the following details vividly, though.

It’s Halloween night probably around 1977 and it’s almost 8pm. I and two other friends, Mitch Hart and Paul Naylor, were heading back to the street corner we’d all have to split up at and walk back home alone.

See kids, back then, parents let their kids out without supervision. Go watch Mad Men. It’s true!

Anywhoot, we’re a block away from our final corner, each of us boasting on what kind of candy we got (heavily influenced by the Charlie Brown Halloween Special – “I got a rock…”) when Paul’s eyes lit up like a jack-o-lantern with a flame thrower in it. He grab’s Mitch’s arm and spins him around.

“Go!” he shouts.

Paul and Mitch, being much more athletic than I was (I’m Booksmart!), take off like the wind.

I’m slow. I’m like, candy drunk slow. “Wha…?”

Out of the blue I’m body checked to the ground. My bag goes flying out of my hands. Two teenagers scoop up my loot and run off down the street yelling back at me to stop crying like a baby.

I wasn’t crying when this all happened. I had the decorum to cry at home, alone in my room, thank you very much.

I Want I Want I Want

Personal Bits

Me: I want to have a coolly named profession. Like Aeronaught.

SharkBoy: (blinks) …

Me: Oh! Or Aqualebrity!

SharkBoy: (Fully not listening) …

Me: Or Sesmictarian. Or Sociabrarian. Or Octonaught!

SharkBoy: I want you to shut up.

Me: (deflated) The man. Keeping me down.