If Steve Jobs doesn’t come over to the creators of this music video’s house and give them a personal back rub with happy ending, then society is lost. (Via Gizmodo)
Category Archives: Distractions
TV Show Funtime Memory Blarg
Quark: Buck Henry wrote this long before Spaceballs came out. Highly superior (which isn’t saying much, but hey, I was a geeky kid at home on a Friday night).
Project UFO: Again, at home on the weekend glued to the TV watching this crap. But looking at the episode synopsis, I think X Files borrowed heavily from this show.
Fantastic Voyage: Back when Filmation was making buckets of cash for one of the original Archies series, they made a few episodes of this bastardized movie.
Logans Run (TV): Pew pew pew! Pew pew pew!! Remember, no other element makes a 70s sci fi series converted from a movie more cheesier than an emotionless robot played by an actor at the end of his career.
Bully for You!
With everyone hyped up on Grand Theft Auto IV right now I thought I’d jump back a bit and yammer on about a Wii game from the same company: Bully – The Scholarship Edition
Take the core game play concepts of the Grant Theft Auto games where the flawed lead character has to fight his way to the top to succeed, remix it into the microcosm of a run down private school and it translates surprisingly well. Our bitter, eternally scowling hero, Jimmy, is dumped at the gates of Bullworth Academy and is immediately faced with fight or flight decisions.
Graphic violence? Check. Smart alec writing? Got it. Misogynistic portrayal of women? Certainement! Minigames that take the best of Cooking Mama, Wii Sport and Big Brain Academy and tie them in seamlessly with the story/game action? Yes!Yes!Yes!*
Would I let my 14 year old kid play it? Not without a stern talk beforehand. Any younger, I’d probably balk at it. But that’s where my parenting skills come into play, I guess. Yes the game glorifies violent behaviour, but by 14 you’ve been exposed to a lot worse on TV. Let alone in the school yards we send them off to… Ultimately I don’t have kids and the average age of gamers these days is 33, so this whole argument is moot to me and how I conduct myself in public.
I’m glad they fixed the glitches found in the Xbox versions and added smart Wii controller integration (nunchuck/Wiimote combos that are unlocked as you interact with the school’s freaks and geeks), but the graphics are definitely not sumptuous. But it’s the Wii – it’s forgiven for highly interactive game play.
And take this as you may, either homophobic of homocapable, there is school boy on school boy action, nicknamed “Mild Tea” (a nod to the Hot Coffee hack in GTA San Andreas):
*Zanta reference.
My True Hip Hop Name
If kids can have a Hip Hop replacement for the big purple dinosaur, I want to replace my white bread name:
Mac N Cheez
!ntere Ess Ting
Whaka Mole
Sir Earl Greysalot
Wrinkly Belt Wrinkles (or Dr. Wrink for short)
Lazee DR
Yours…?
Summer Movie Predictions
Comfy Shoes A love story where a socially stunted man (Haley Joel Osment) working in a woman’s shoe store wishes to get close to one of his customers (Lily Tomlin). Wil Farrel stars as the Fairy Godfather that mistakenly transforms him into a pair of pink starkly espadrilles. Through a whacky dance contest, she comes to love him just as he is. First Weekend Box Office Gross: $15M
The Ladder James Woods takes on the suffering US economy in this rags to riches to rags to riches to rags story. Instant fame from a YouTube video drops him in fortune but he loses it all in Celebrity Poker Tournament. Can he win it all back on one last shot at the big time? Terri Garr co-stars. FWBOG: $10M
Flout It! Voice talents such as George Clooney and Muriel Hemmingway are lent to this uplifting children’s completely CGI movie about a Flute that hates lips! FWBOG: $32M
Gorgeous Car Vin Diesel is the man without a home, until he comes across a gorgeous car left in a ditch. With love and perseverance he fixes it up and enters it in local car shows, catching the attention of local car show mafioso. Can he regain his dignity and still manage to get the blue ribbon? FWBOG: $25M
Big Feet on the Ground Can a dancer (Molly Cyrus) after being expelled from the professional ballroom dance circuit, make it in the competitive world of Tap and Song Kid’s Party Characters? Will she find love? John Voit co-stars as the evil party dispatcher who is out to break her will to dance. FWBOG: $4M
The Creepy Vincent D’Onofrio finds himself in a mysterious world that haunts him in waking hours. Can he figure out how to regain a normal life while finding out the mystery of The Creepy? FWBOG: $5.00
Name Them All!
(Via ChopShop Via BotJunkie Via Gizmodo)
Can you name all 51 of these robots? (Some are arguably Cyborgs but feh, it’s Friday!). I’m missing about 10 of them. Answers to come soon.
Games, You Say?
I read somewhere that small, imaginative games are on the rise. I blame ADD and cell phone apps.
Ponder that while you scoop up humans and make the biggest splat circumference (PC only, sorry SharkBoy).
Apparently the creator and creative chap, Kyle Gaber, is making games for WiiWare. If they’re like Swarm, I’d hit that.
Clone Wars 3D
Gizmodo is a forced to be reckoned with, even on Sundays.
Leaked two minute trailer for the Star Wars TV show.
I think I pooped a little in my pants!!! I love how they’ve translated the Genndy Tartakovsky style to 3D. Swoon!!
The Cake is a Lie
Torontoist has a great article about a Weighted Companion Cube showing up on Bloor & Euclid as it pops through from Yonge and Bloor (even with peek-a-boo visual clues where the other half of the cube is located)
AWESOME!
This was a triumph
I’m making a note here
HUGE SUCCESS
It’s hard to overstate my satisfaction
Aperture Sciencewe do what we must because we can
for the good of all of us except for the ones who are dead
but there’s no sense crying over every mistake
you just keep on trying until you run out of cake
and the science gets done and you make a neat gun
for the people who are still aliveI’m not even angry
I’m being so sincere right now
even though you broke my heart and killed me
and torn into pieces
and threw every piece into a fire
as they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!
Now these points of data make a beautiful line
and we’re out of beta, we’re releasing on time
so I’m glad I got burned
Think of all the things we learned for the people that are still alivego ahead and leave me
I think I prefer to stay inside
maybe you’ll find someone else to help you
maybe black mesa
that was a joke, haha, fat chance
anyway this cake is great, it’s so delicious and moist
look at me still talking, when there’s science to do
when I look out there it makes me glad I’m not you
I’ve experiments to run, there is research to be done
on the people who are still aliveand believe me I am still alive
I’m doing science and I’m still alive
I feel FANTASTIC and I’m still alive
While you are dying I’ll be still alive
and when you’re dead I’ll be still alive
STILL ALIVE, still alive
Bassoon Hero
Just got this from one of the Photographers (click to embiggen):
Heeelarious!
(Note: with the NYT linking to this post, the creator, Andrew H, has asked me to post a revised, cleaner, truer-to-life version. He’s a credit to Photoshop, kids!)