That snowflakes are Winter’s butterflies?
That every time a baby is born, so is a grandmother?
That this house may be a mess but it is blessed?
That you are welcome anytime as long as you’re nice?
That puppies lick tears faster than they can dry on a cheek?
That a sunbeam is the sky’s way of saying “Hello!”?
That the kitchen is where the family grows?
That a kitten is a heart’s love battery?
That my husband is always right… “right over there”?
That a pick nick still feels like home, but with less dishes?
That baking and a baby use the same ingredients: Love?
That I’m superfucking proud to be a wrinkled tart of a grandmother?
Okay that last one was wrong. I’m at work, recounting the shops we visited in Vermont and I suddenly realized a full week after, that I could write the stuff you see on faux-antique signs in Marshalls (HomeSense, to us Canadian folk).
So when you go into someone’s house and you see a sign that announces “This home is built with mortar, bricks and family” you read it here first.
8 thoughts on “Did You Know…”
so baked babies mean twice the love? i can’t wait to see the jury react.
If you’re going into business, how about some for the gay market? Did you know…
That drag queens are Church Street’s butterflies?
That every time a baby is born, a lesbian gives thanks for turkey basters?
That this house may be a mess but I’m on meth?
That you are welcome anytime as long as you’re hung?
That bears lick butt faster than they lick ice cream cones?
That a vibrator is a hole’s love battery?
That my husband is always right… “right over there, on his knees in the backroom”?
That I’m superfucking proud to be a wrinkled fart of a bath-house troll?
Home homely lol and did you know that when you have a cold you would be safer lying in bed with your damper opened ;-)Dont even ask me what that means. I heard cbs offering before too 😉
Phronk: Jesus… it’s like Asimov’s Three Laws re-written long after his death:
“Every time a baby is born so is a grandmother unless she’s a zombie DEAD grandmother”
cb: that takes me back to the family cottage days with the rusted out septic tank…
I noticed the grandmother one too… and I’m thinking “not if she DEAD”.
Oh, and did you know that if you sprinkle when you tinkle, you should please be neat and wipe the seat??
“That every time a baby is born, so is a grandmother?”
I don’t mean to be morbid, but not EVERY time.
Great, now I’m going to wonder about all my baked goods.
I liked the last one the best