Carlton Streetcar, 6pm.
At Sherbourne two teens dressed in similar, well kept shirt and tie combos climb onto the half full streetcar and start to make their way down the aisle. My iPod is on but I can see they’re engaging everyone they pass. Howdy! Hello! Good day to you!
Good lord. Mormons!
I gaze intently at the outside whizzing by as Mormon #2 passes and smiles at me. I don’t respond. Mormon #1 is trying to speak to someone near the front while Mormon #2 sits himself down beside a gay man by the rear doors. I turn my iPod down. I’m not going to miss this!
“Wonderfull weather today!”
“Yes.” Curt. The gay guy knows whats coming.
“My name is (bleh),” he says and extends his hand to be shook.
The gay guy shakes it and does this bizzare thing after. Dissmissive, flippand, his hand does a “no more, please” up in front of the Mormon’s face. The Mormon gets the hint. He gets up and wanders to the back.
As I’m leaving I make eye contact with the gay guy. I roll my eyes. He rolls his.
13 thoughts on “More Mons!”
Your comment about Scientology reminds me that I have been meaning to write a letter to NOW about a recent experience with them…Keep an eye out!
Well the Hitler youth were really cute.
You can say what you want about Mormans, but they are at least smart enough to send the really cute ones out to greet (convert) the public. š
I’m pretty sure they only pick the cute Mormons to be missionaries. the ugly ones have to stay in Utah and make that hideous underwear they all have to wear.
My Friend Michael is an ex-Mormon (they asked him to leave when he divorced his wife, came out of the closet, and sued for custody of his 4 kids). He’s a real laff-riot when you get him started on the Latter Day Saints.
I used to love watching them around Brother’s Restaurant – which was surrounded by their headquarters building at one point in Toronto…
They’d come in a group all shirt, tie, and Scientologized bible and sit like ole’ tyme christians – girls to one side and boys to the other.
And they’d all have the squeekly clean burger with a side of depravity.
And try to suck coca-cola up straws with lips so tense a razor blade wouldn’t pass easily.
The restaurant is gone – some say swallowed up by the LRon Machine.
They’re called tracts – kind of like what heroine junkies get – no that’s tracks…
Never Mind!!
I don’t hate them as much as say… Scientologists. If they replaced the creepy forwardness on a post-work streetcar trip with just a pamphlet, I’d be groovy with that.
Hey now, not everyone who lives here is an annoying, uptight Mormon who just wants to convert you. Some of us hate them just as much as you do. š
Check out Latter Days for some good Mormon pr0n. And, remind me to tell you about meeting the gay (ex)Mormons when I lived in Seattle.
They were certainly well dressed and attractive.
In a Stepford Wives kinda way
I have sexy thoughts of deflowering those boys…sigh.
I think we should build a giant wall around Utah. No one gets in, no one gets out.
i can’t believe you didn’t say “you are not the droids i’m looking for.”
bad robot.