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{"id":3670,"date":"2009-04-26T11:18:26","date_gmt":"2009-04-26T16:18:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/?p=3670"},"modified":"2009-04-26T11:18:26","modified_gmt":"2009-04-26T16:18:26","slug":"fat-jewelery","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.deadrobot.com\/2009\/04\/fat-jewelery\/","title":{"rendered":"Fat Jewelery"},"content":{"rendered":"

I tried to rip SharkBoy’s underwear this morning. Not “off”, just rip it so he’d stop wearing gitch with holes in it (godforbidhe’dbeinanaccident!!) We wrassled and screamed like teen girls at a Zack Efron mall appearance. <\/p>\n

In the ensuing struggle, my wedding ring flew off. I have lost that much weight.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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