Looking at my stats brought up a few hits on sulky so I wandered off into the web and followed links to the OHRA’s harness racing website that taught me a new term: The device that the jockey sits in, in a harness race is called a Sulky. Who knew?

I loved the site graphics, which reminded me of a cross of John K of Ren and Stimpy fame, and UPA, the 50s/Flintstone style. After looking around a while, I learned even more: how to bet at a track, which always confused me. When I lived in England or when I watch Coronation Street, it was a mysterious lifestyle to see the curtained-off betting shacks with motor mouthed announcements mumbling out of the doorway. Now I know what they were doing in there, which, to my surprise, wasn’t pornographic at all.

The fastest way to learn how to wager was to sign up and play a free game or two on their Flash horse race game, which I realize that it’s like getting digital crack from a virtual dealer: the first one is free, click here now! I chose to be Marco, the bald, cigar-chomping, Italian mobsteresque stereotype and started to bet my free $100 away.

Disclaimer: there’s no actual gambling on the site, it’s just a gateway drug to get you to the race tracks, conveniently listed in the “character’s favorite place” to gamble.

The process is explained step by step and I would like to take a moment to acknowledge the artist here: Sir/Madam, I love your horse design. Especially this one: Propaganda. I felt an immediate attachment and promptly bet $50 on her.

And lost it in seconds.

That’s what I get for betting on looks.

The only downside on the site I have to mention here is that the sections: History, Ask A Question, The actual Flash horse game, Locations, Jockey info and the Member’s Log in (Check out the utterly bizzare Ron and Don at home videos) are all Mystery Meat Navigation: You don’t know what you’re clicking on until you get there. I had to click on each of the “characters” to get to each section which makes for a confusing first visit. But explore. It’s worth a good few moments in your cube.

*apologies to Robert Palmer for the title swipe.