Tag Archives: coronation street

Sulky Girl

Distractions

Looking at my stats brought up a few hits on sulky so I wandered off into the web and followed links to the OHRA’s harness racing website that taught me a new term: The device that the jockey sits in, in a harness race is called a Sulky. Who knew?

I loved the site graphics, which reminded me of a cross of John K of Ren and Stimpy fame, and UPA, the 50s/Flintstone style. After looking around a while, I learned even more: how to bet at a track, which always confused me. When I lived in England or when I watch Coronation Street, it was a mysterious lifestyle to see the curtained-off betting shacks with motor mouthed announcements mumbling out of the doorway. Now I know what they were doing in there, which, to my surprise, wasn’t pornographic at all.

The fastest way to learn how to wager was to sign up and play a free game or two on their Flash horse race game, which I realize that it’s like getting digital crack from a virtual dealer: the first one is free, click here now! I chose to be Marco, the bald, cigar-chomping, Italian mobsteresque stereotype and started to bet my free $100 away.

Disclaimer: there’s no actual gambling on the site, it’s just a gateway drug to get you to the race tracks, conveniently listed in the “character’s favorite place” to gamble.

The process is explained step by step and I would like to take a moment to acknowledge the artist here: Sir/Madam, I love your horse design. Especially this one: Propaganda. I felt an immediate attachment and promptly bet $50 on her.

And lost it in seconds.

That’s what I get for betting on looks.

The only downside on the site I have to mention here is that the sections: History, Ask A Question, The actual Flash horse game, Locations, Jockey info and the Member’s Log in (Check out the utterly bizzare Ron and Don at home videos) are all Mystery Meat Navigation: You don’t know what you’re clicking on until you get there. I had to click on each of the “characters” to get to each section which makes for a confusing first visit. But explore. It’s worth a good few moments in your cube.

*apologies to Robert Palmer for the title swipe.

Pride and Pre-Juices

Queer stuff, Toronto

All Photos here.

Pride in ketchupserifThursday:
Met up with The Photogs, The Mailman and Mr Insurance and broke my first rule of Pride (I think I broke 99% of them, this year), and had drinks at O’Greedys. Just drinks. While the service was attentive, mostly it was just smokey. Two pitchers of sangria, one pitcher of tap beer and a basket of poppers came to $120. Thanks for not letting me down, O’Greedys!

Friday, we went to get SharkBoy’s new ink and saw Wall•E. 72 hours later and I’m still thinking about it. Sign of a really good movie. Meesh was a bit endorphined-out so we headed home early, no visit to the street.

Saturday was busy: 7:30am we went to The Terminal Barber, where we manscaped, then off to the optomitrist where we met the most delightful new salesperson in the shop connected to our doctor’s office. She sussed us out in seconds and we left after SharkBoy dropped $1000 on new frames, lenses and contacts. Ow.

Radio City partyThen off to Church Street for breakfast again (I know I know), but huge KUDOS for The Churchmouse for not gouging their customers, just reducing the amount on the menu for faster service. So far I can say I have never had a bad meal there. Various early morning freaks abounded.

Off to a mid-day party at a friend’s at Radio City. These guys own a condo on the 9th floor who’s patio is as equally large as their condo. It was fantastic! Met new people and got a bit wet with some waterfuns.

Home for a drunk nap, then onto the street to try to catch TransX and Dragonette. Line up was impossible, so we stood outside the beer garden and while we could still hear them, bopped by ourselves. Home to bed.

Sunday was possibly the most relaxed Pride I’ve ever had. Breakfast in bed with Coronation Street (as usual) and then off to the Coach House for some real food. Then we wandered the street, chatting with people and taking the odd photo. This year I didn’t really have the heart to take pictures of weirdos and freaks like I’ve done in the past. I’m bitter about being bitter.

Mayor in da house!We got to see Kids on TV after a great set by two DJs who’s names I didn’t catch, but they played Black Kids, and we danced like 21 year olds. Then, we see Mayor David Miller. In a queer beer garden. Name any other mayor who’d do that. As Kids on TV are waving around a dildo-encrusted blow up sex doll, The Honourable David Miller was moving respectively and chatting with people around him, allowing photos to be taken and having a great time. He walked right by us and I guess SharkBoy had huge saucers for eyes (because the Mayor is like, you know, his boss, sort of) because The Honourable David Miller smiled wide and said to both of us WHILE PLACING A HAND ON SHARKBOY’S CHEST: “Happy Pride!”

Man has my vote.

Back home for a powernap and to tend to SharkBoy’s burning scalp. Poor dear. Overcast skies CAN burn you. Anyway, we went back to see Jully Black and SharkBoy wore his ThinkGeek Equalizer shirt. Which was a bit of a mistake. By 10pm, 99% of the people in the street and beer gardens are pissed to the gills. Wearing a shirt that flashes light in sync with sound for a couple thousand drunk people was asking for abuse. He drew attention to himself above and beyond what he’s use to and I was seething with jealousy. I’m not often out-gadgeted by SharkBoy. He was getting stopped every 2 feet and was chatted up which made me dance harder or hoot at the music or juggle plates. At one point someone waved at me. Gladly I wandered over and the person said “Can you move over? I want my friend to see that guy’s shirt.”

Mostly people swore at him: “THAT’S A FUCKIN’ AWESOME SHIRT!” “FUCK! COOL!” and “HOLY FUCK HOW DOES THAT WORK?” while they pawed his chest. One woman got a nice Indian burn on her wrist from not getting the clue of “no touchy!!” Poor drunk dear. Video below:

In all, a subdued, yet most enjoyable Pride! Yay!