After a year’s preparation and weeks of worrysome bathing suit purchases, we were off to Miami to get on board The Explorer of the Seas!

First day images here.

Day One – NIGHT IN MIAMI
The Mailman, The Busdriver, Sharkboy and I are walking away from the gate after a near perfect flight down when suddenly The Busdriver announces he has to go back to the plane. He’s left his camera onboard. Not even 5 min after disembarking, the camera is lost and no amount of pleading with the crew would let him back on (obviously). The lost baggage claim people were less than helpful, as that they didn’t even want to take The Busdriver’s name and number just in case it showed up. This whole ordeal makes me think of an opening line from my brother’s play The Innocent Eye Test: “Why does Air Canada hate us so?” This was the first of a couple Left Behind moments the Busdriver was to experience…

To the Clay hotel, which was glam on the outside and just below basic on the inside. No matter, we’re not there for the luxury, just the night. The Juliet balcony over the market was a nice touch though.

At this point I’d like to go on record as saying “I love Miami.” It’s a beautiful town and would live there in a heartbeat if there weren’t so many Americans. Juuuust kidding. But it is a great city. I love the architecture, the culture and the vibe. If I were to live there, I’d certainly have a scooter or a Segway…

Jackael (Jack and Michael) and the Photogs (Rod and Bill) showed up just in time for all of us to enjoy lunch at the hotel restaurant (with drinks!). It became instantly clear that we were travelling with some severely undersexed individuals as comments started to fly about (and at!) our poor waiter, Deigo. It was like having lunch with refined Italian Construction workers. Deigo had a disarming smile but Michael’s constant flirtatious questions certainly threw him off balance.

The 8 of us (Evil Panda and Grizz would be meeting us on the ship the day we sailed) then wandered down to the beach and lo and behold, we instantly found the gay section, marked off by massive rainbow flags. Lucky us! Apparently Miami has zero bear population, judging by the amount of body fat/hair on the sunbathers. On our wander, The Busdriver experienced Left Behind Moment 2: his reading glasses went AWOL during a fun photo shoot by a lifeguard station. While he searched for them, we decide to wander down to the end of the beach to watch that night’s round of cruise ships sail out of port as the sun set behind the condos and palms. Some of the posse had never seen a cruise ship in action and were suitably impressed. I kept thinking about the dinners…

We lazily walked back to the hotel along Ocean Drive to see some Deco and beautiful people. Sharkboy insisted on stopping by Miami Ink, the tattoo parlour made famous by the TLC TV show of the same name. We peer in the windows like it was Xmas at The Bay, but no stars were to be seen, except the new shop manager. After that the group split up. Some went looking for a bar, some went to bed, Sharkboy and I looked and found our favorite Wallgreens for pure American shopping excitement. Back to the hotel and in bed by 11pm, the sound of the salsa music wafting up from the bar, transporting us to slumberland.