Die Enviroment, DIE!

We’re leaving for camping right after work tonight thusly I have driven to work this morning.

Oh. My. Car-ness! I love driving to work with my window open, listening to shock jocks saying “poop” and “cornhole” and scooting around traffic! It’s a highly addictive alternative to commuting with the “human sewers” (the subway).

And a comedy of errors is discovering your car has a anti-theft device the hard way. Imagine a three-way shouting match between me, Sharkboy and the parking garage attendant as the Honda beeps it’s little heart out. I stuck the key into the trunk before “unlocking” the car and suddenly the car wakes up with a symphony of honking. I rip the driver side door open, in search of a button to shut off the alarm. Sharkboy is yelling at me to not hitting the “panic button” on the keys and the Attendant just wants to know who the hell we are since this is the first time he’s seen us in “his” garage.

“Who are you?” The attendant to us.

“Shut up!” Me to the car.

“Shut up!” Sharkboy to the attendant.

“Beep!” The car to anyone who cared.

“Mind your own business!” Sharkboy to the attendant.

“Beep!” The car, dutifully.

“We rent from a friend!” Me to the Attendant.

“Are you hitting the panic button?” Sharkboy to me.

“Beep!” The car, mindlessly.

“No! Close the trunk!” Me, to Sharkboy, shutting car doors and trunk.

“Do you live here?” The Attendant to Sharkboy.

“Yeah! Upstairs!” Sharkboy to the Attendant, waving vaguely to the roof of the garage.