I just had a manager run up to my desk, panicking like a drag queen who’s lost her left falsie and the DJ just hit play. This guy would never acknowledge me on good days and suddenly I’m his pal. He sent a file to the other web guy, now at lunch, to be put live on the company site. Of course its wrong and goodlorditneedstocomedownnowNOWNOW!

I like to treat these people like I’ve caught them letting their dogs crap on my lawn. Because basically that’s what they’re doing: I’ve screwed up it’s your problem now, too.

I like to add a stupid “Well lets see now…” look pass over my face when they need an answer right away.

I am destined to be fired from every job I have.