Bah humbug

My coworker just asked me about how I celebrate Xmas, to which I replied that I didnt. What followed was a line of questioning like I was on trial. And when I tried to explain myself he interrupted me to tell me that it was “too bad” like I had the blackest heart in all of Whoville.

Sir, I say fuck off, to you and yours. Would he condemn me so quickly if I was Jewish? Because my family is spread across Canada and the UK, I take greater pleasure out of celebrating New Years and other calendar events with friends and whatever family is available than subscribing to your ideal of a perfect Xmas. Plus I am barely religious (hence why I type “Xmas” all the time) so why should I celebrate this mystical birth while paying into the stress of the season?

Yes I do exchange gifts. Yes I do go to Xmas parties with something in hand for the host. I am charitable at this time of year. I am not the original Grinch, you dickwad. I just dont celebrate like you do, so keep your self-righteous attitude and fake sympathy and shove it in your stocking and stop looking down your nose at me. You’ve obviously lost your sense of what Xmas is suppose to be.

Oh and Merry Christmas!

5 thoughts on “Bah humbug”

Jim
December 15, 2004 at 10:32 am

Hehehe. I’m somewhat of a scrooge too. My family celebrates “Dysfunctional Family Christmas” at my house every year because my two brothers will not set foot in each other’s houses.

My most vivid Christmas memories are of stress, fighting and yelling. One year I almost got into a fist fight with my dad because he couldn’t find his smokes. We kicked him out of the hosue on Chirstmas day. It was awesome.

It’s only in the past couple of years I’ve come to sort of like the period from 6:00 PM December 24th through 8:00 PM on the 25th. My goal is to let my son grow up enjoying the holiday in the way that I never did.

Fuck us, fuck us every one.